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| Chris Bunworth (played Richard), Lee Mason (Mikey) and Marcella Russo (Rose) in the season at Dante's and at The Black Box. I was very lucky to have such a brilliant team take on this script. |
Anne-marie Peard, AussieTheatre.com
Kill
the Wolf: A dark fairytale was originally produced
by 9 Minds after it won the 9 Minds 9 Works competition. The script published here is the
Tech script which was developed from the original script by Director Lucy
Freeman for the production at The Black Box Theatre at The Victorian Arts
Centre.
To see 9 Minds current productions, go here: http://www.9minds.com.au. Lighting was by Scott Alan. To see images from the production and more of Scott's work, go here: http://www.sallanld.com/galleries/32
Although it is written as a two act play it
has always been conceived of and performed as a continuous piece.
Characters
Mikey WOLFE:
about 30.
Richard WOLFE: Mikey’s
father; he has an acquired brain injury, which affects his memory, ability to
reason and co-ordination.
Rose: Twenties,
Beautiful
Act 1 takes place one
day in early December; Act 2 on New Year’s Eve
Act
1
Preset
Off stage (but visible in Glad-Wrap
Alley) a ‘kitchen bench’ is preset with orange juice bottle, a glass/mug, a
spoon, a blue bowl, a medicine bottle, Mikey’s mobile phone, a chopping board,
carrots, a knife, a beer bottle, a cloth, a wolf mask and one of Richard’s costume changes. Preset off
stage UL a new tennis ball and a second dog bowl preset with cheerios and milk.
Preset off stage DR a beer bottle and a shopping basket with groceries in it.
On Stage : Richard sits at the Dining
Room Table (2 chairs)with an old tennis ball in has hand and some cheerios in
his pocket. DR is a dog bowl. DC is a packet of peppermint tea.
As Richard waits for his breakfast, he
fiddles with Bo-Bo’s tennis ball, takes some cheerios out of his pocket and
walks downstage to place them in Bo-Bo’s bowl (etc).
Audience settle. Blackout.
SFX ‘Delerium’ track plays (loud)
Scene 0.5
LX
up on Rose dressed in Angel Wings stands on the porthole podium (as if on stage) as ‘Delerium’ track
continues
LX Mikey observes her from the dining
room edge, with a white bowl a cereal packet and a carton of milk in his hands.
He has a business card and mobile phone
pre-set in his pocket.
Scene 1
LX down on Rose as
‘Delerium’ fades out and LX up on dining room reveal Richard still sitting at
the table in his pyjamas. He still looks messy and sleep-smelly, Mikey stays
downstage and observes Rose exit DR. Rose (quickly!) removes Angel wings.
Richard: Yes please.
Mikey: What? What do you want?
Richard: Come on…
Mikey: Mikey.
Richard: Mikey. Yeah, I knew that ...
Rose enters(no wings) DR
with the supermarket basket. Mikey observes Rose in the supermarket and as she
crosses centre...
Mikey: (Handing her a packet of tea) Excuse me, you dropped your peppermint tea.
Rose: (Smiling at Mikey) Thanks.
Rose exits to DL and
Mikey makes his way to Richard at the dining table.
Richard: ... Come on, Mikey, you know what I want.
Mikey: Yes I do, but you still have to ask.
Richard: I can’t believe this. I have the same thing every morning and you expect
me to have to remind you every bloody day.
Mikey: Don’t swear.
Richard: Yeah whatever. My mouth
Mikey: Not whatever, everyone else has to ask nicely. No one gets to just say
‘Yes please’ and whatever you want just happens. What do you want? What would you
like me to do for you?
Richard: I would like some milk
please. And cereal.
Mikey places the white
bowl on the table and starts to make the cereal.
Mine is the blue bowl.
Mikey: Yeah. I’ll get it.
Mikey exits to the
glad-wrap kitchen and collects a blue bowl, a spoon, a bottle of OJ and a
glass/mug and cloth
Richard: (To Mikey offstage)
And can I have a glass of orange juice too please. In my special cup. I mean
glass. My special glass. It’s a glass, isn’t it, Mikey?
Mikey: (Returning to dining room) Either’s fine.
Richard: But glass is better than cup, isn’t it?
Mikey: I know which one you’re talking about, so either is okay.
Richard: But it’s a glass, isn’t it? It’s made of glass so it must be a glass;
isn’t that right?
Mikey: Yep. Sounds good to me.
Mikey makes Richard’s
cereal and pours his drink. Richard chows down the cereal as soon as he gets it
Mikey: Who’ve you got today?
Richard: Alex. Always have Alex on Tuesdays. Alex sucks. She makes me walk
everywhere. We always go to the zoo or the art gallery. The zoo’s good but the
gallery sucks. Did I tell you she wants to make love to me?
Mikey: No.
Richard: She does. They all do. But Alex told me she loves me.
Mikey: Really?
Mikey returns to the
glad-wrap kitchen with the OJ bottle, cereal box and milk carton
Richard: Last week. She tells me all the time, but last week she said, ‘Richard,
I love you… and I really want to suck your cock.’
Ha! That’s a good one,
eh? Imagine that: ‘Richard, I love you and I really want to suck your cock’!
Mikey, pokes his head
out from the glad-wrap kitchen.
Mikey: Do you want me to clean your bowl or are you going to do it yourself?
Richard: You can do it.
Mikey: You can at least bring it over.
Richard: Jeez. You’re so lazy it’s unbelievable.
Mikey: (Returning to Dining Room) I’m not lazy.
Richard: But you’re not going to pick up the bowl?
Mikey: No. I’m not. Are you going to do your washing today?
Richard: Na. Alex can do that. It’s boring.
Mikey: You have to remember to change your sheets.
Richard: Na. Boring.
Mikey: Okay. I’ll do your bowl. Get that ball off the table, it’s disgusting.
Then have a shower and brush your teeth. Alex’ll be here in twenty minutes and
I have to go to work.
Mikey takes the cereal
bowl and spoon to the glad-wrap kitchen.
Richard: (To Mikey offstage)
You work a lot, you know that?
Mikey: Yep.
Richard: Suddenly excited:
We could go to McDonalds
and I could have a cheeseburger and then we could see a film. I get in for free
because I’m disabled.
Mikey: (Returning to the Dining Room) The person going with
you gets in for free, not you Dad
Richard: Yeah but they
always pay for me. That would be good if you would do that with me. I’d like
that.
Mikey: Yes Dad, but my work is very exciting and I love it. And if I’m not
there I don’t know what might happen. The whole fabric of society might start
to break down. It’s so amazing I sometimes wish I could be there all the time.
They laugh, Richard
louder than Mikey.
Richard: Ha! Your job is shit and everybody knows it. Even I know it… What do you
do again? Hang on. Don’t tell me. I know it. You’ve told me before haven’t you?
Wait. You sell… cups… that’s it, isn’t it? Coffee cups. You sell coffee cups in
the city. I’m right, aren’t I? (Mikey leads him in reciting) “Captain Cups: Novelty Coffee Cups ...and
accessories”
Mikey: Yep. Good one, Dad.
Richard: Yep. Shit job. That’s what everyone says. Alex says it. Even you say it.
Mikey: Yep.
Richard: Before the accident, I had a better job than you.
Mikey: Oh, so you’re remembering before the accident today?
Richard: I was good at my job.
Mikey: Can you remember what you were like as a father? Did you think you were
good at that? Do you remember?
Richard: I was a big boss – and I made a lot of money
Mikey: And you went to work every
day, just like I have to.
Richard: Don’t go. You’re a shit, you know that? Go then. Fuck off. Get out and
don’t come back.
Mikey: Yeah, whatever. Don’t swear.
Richard: NO! Not whatever. This is my mouth. This is my house.
Mikey: (As Mikey makes to exit DC, Richard, holding his OJ cup, rises to
follow him.) Seeya. Have a
good day. Brush your teeth before Alex gets here.
Mikey makes his way
offstage DR and heads to the porthole/office R. Richard pours the remainder of his juice into Bo-Bo’s
bowl, picks up the dog bowl and exits to glad-wrap kitchen (whilst offstage he
and moves angel wings from DR to UR and does a costume change)
SFX phone ringing as LX go down on Dining
Room
Scene 2
LX up, Rose’s bedroom, early morning.
The room contains a bed preset with a mobile phone and photo frame on it. Rose enters her room and grabs her phone . When
Rose puts her phone to her ear SFX stops.
Rose dials Sean’s
number, flops onto the bed and listens to Sean’s machine
V/O: Hi you’ve called Sean. I’m not
available to take your call, but leave a message and I’ll get back to you. (SFX BEEP)
Rose: Shit!
She hangs up, gets her
resume off her bed, and exits, making her way (offstage) to the porthole/office
L.
Scene3
LX up on the tiny
back office at Captain Cups. (Porthole).Preset in the office L are two coffee
cups on hooks at shoulder height one has a slogan saying ‘World’s Greatest Dad’
on it.
Mikey: (On the phone) Where is it? Why can’t you send me the right… (calms
himself) I can’t do this
unless you stop sending me the wrong... (calms himself) STUFF...
Rose enters to
porthole/office L . There’s a beat where Mikey just looks at her.
(Into the phone) Forget about it.
Rose: Hi.
Mikey: I helped you with the Peppermint Tea...
Rose: Sorry. Hi. I’m Rose.
Mikey: Didn’t I see you in the supermarket the other day?
Rose shrugs – don’t
think so.
I’m sure it was you
Rose: We spoke on the phone.
Mikey: Yeah, that’s right, we did … and now you’re here. .Hi I’m Mike Wolfe.
Fantastic. So. Yeah. I guess: What do you know about selling?
Rose: A bit. I’ve sold stuff before.
Mikey: Yeah? What?
Rose: Oh… phones, insurance, “travel and adventure clothing,” books, soap,
records…
A beat.
I’m a singer.
Mikey: Yeah? Me too!
Rose: Really? Wow! What do you sing?
Mikey: Oh, you’re a singer. I thought you said you were single. (Ha Ha) Are you in a band?
Rose: Yeah… I was
Mikey: What were they called? Maybe I’ve seen them?
Rose: Charlie’s Angel’s …
Mikey: Hmmmm…
Rose: …a group of chicks in angel wings… we
played at…
Mikey: Na (beat).That’s cool. I’m
learning the guitar.
Rose: Yeah? Where?
Mikey: Nowhere. I’m just teaching myself, you know, out of a book.
Rose: Cool… So: how long have you been here?
Mikey: At Captain Cups? Eight years.
Rose: Wo.
Mikey: Cannot explain how it’s been eight years… moves on: Okay, you probably know all
this, but I’m going to give you a brief introduction to Captain Cups’ Four
Steps to Sales Success…
He stands up. In such
a small space, he and Rose have to squirm around each other. Rose tries to
shrink away from him but Mikey finds it necessary to touch her.
I just need to get a
cup.
He gets a cup.
Step One: Say Hi. Hi.
A beat.
Step Two: Break the
Ice. Hey, how are you today? Nice top.
A beat.
Step Three: Work Out
Her Needs and Wants. Get the customer talking. So Rose, do you go out for coffee?
Rose: Yes.
Mikey: Where do you go?
Rose: Out. Around.
Mikey: Around here?
Rose: No.
MIkey
Do you have coffee at
home?
Rose: Sure. Every day.
Mikey: Okay, great. Think of your coffee mugs at home and tell me what you like
about them and what you would change? Would you like bigger or smaller cups?
Lighter? Heavier? Different colours? You get the picture.
Rose: Yeah.
Mikey: Step Four: Find Out What’s Wrong. Too expensive? Too cheap? Wrong size?
Wrong shape? Some people will never buy, but most people come in wanting to buy
something. There might be
just one thing wrong, one reason they won’t buy. What can I fix? What can’t I
fix? So tell me, Rose, what’s wrong with this cup? (Handing her the cup)
Rose: Nothing.
Mikey: Ok. Cool. Now you do me.
Mikey steps out of the
porthole- and returns as the customer. Rose summons her smile and begins.
Rose: Hey. How you doing?
Mikey: I’m well thanks. How are you?
Rose: I’m good. Are you after anything in particular today, or just browsing?
Mikey: Well, actually, it just so happens I’m after a coffee cup.
Rose: Great! I happen to have a couple here that might interest you. (She
gets a second cup) We’ve got
‘World’s Greatest Dad’ and...
Mikey: Yeah maybe not, but I’m sure you’ve got others.
Rose: Yeah… of course… I’m sure we do…It’s a cup shop
Mikey: Don’t worry about it. There are heaps around. You’ll be fine. In fact,
I’m sure you’ll be fantastic. You have the advantage that people like to buy
things from beautiful people. Beautiful people feel comfortable about that and
ugly people feel lucky being served by someone like you. A beat. It’s just one of those things. So: I’d love
to have you. The Christmas sale is coming up so … can you start tomorrow? (Handing
her a business card) If you
have any questions, give me a call.
Mikey watches Rose
(appear to) exit the porthole L. Offstage Rose crawls to UR and attaches Angel
wings. LX down on Mikey who makes his way (offstage) to glad-wrap kitchen in
position with carrot, chopping board and knife.
Scene 4
Richard enters in day
clothes from behind DR pole.
Richard: Bo-Bo! Bo-Bo? Don’t go on the road Bo-Bo. Stupid Dog. (Etc)
Dining room LX to full
as Richard enters dining room from DC steps. Rose begins slowly making her way
downstage, visible in glad-wrap alley.
Richard: (Richard hears Mikey chopping) No green shit. (Richard sits at dining table L.) I don’t like green shit. You know I don’t like
green shit. What’s that?
Mikey: (From glad-wrap kitchen) What’s what?
Richard: That: what you’re chopping now.
Mikey enters dining room-
bringing the knife and board with him It’s a carrot. Mikey sees Rose appear
around the pole DR. Rose enters the dining room DC. Mikey places carrot etc and
his mobile phone on the dining table.
Richard: Oh. That’s all right. I like carrots. I like orange food.
Rose is invisible to
Richard. Rose smiles at Mikey, coy, flattered, flirting and props herself
against the porthole moon.
Mikey: Look at you! You’re gorgeous. I want to
know everything about you. I want to kind of soak you up, be near you-
A beat.
I hope you don’t mind. Am I going too fast?
Rose: No, no
Mikey: I am, aren’t I? It’s just that feeling
of something being
Rose: so right
Mikey: Yes! Or the possibility of it …
Rose: being so perfect
Mikey: I just want to hold you…
Richard: Mikey! Mikey! Look at this! I hurt my leg today!
Mikey: To Rose:
Don’t go.
He turns toward
Richard, then back to Rose.
Don’t.
Again, he turns away,
then back.
I don’t want you to.
Mikey kisses Rose
briefly, easily, while Richard pulls down the side of his pants to show Mikey
his hip.
Richard: Mikey!
Mikey walks over.
Mikey: What happened?
Richard: I stepped on the dog.
Mikey: And you fell?
Richard: I bumped into the wall. It kills.
Mikey: I can’t see anything. Maybe the bruise will come up tomorrow.
Richard: Just here.
Mikey: There?
Mikey touches his hip.
Richard winces.
Oh, you’ve got a little
pimple there as well, maybe an in-grown hair or something.
Richard: It kills.
Mikey: I bet it does. I’ll try to fix it after dinner.
Richard: I didn’t step on him. He walked under my feet and I fell over.
Mikey: I’m sure he didn’t mean it.
Richard: I hate the dog. He makes me sick. All he does is lick his balls-
He bursts into
laughter.
It’s pretty funny how he
does that, isn’t it!
He imitates a dog
licking himself and continues laughing.
It’s amazing how long one
dog can lick his own balls for! But all he does is that and walk under my feet
and trip me over. I hate that. Beat. Can I shoot the dog, Mikey? I want to get an MX5 and shoot the dog.
Mikey: An MX5 is a car, Dad.
Richard: I know that. Well what is it? (Mikey interjects with “an M”), Don’t tell me. (Mikey interjects with “an M-
six”) I know it. (Mikey
interjects with “an M sixte…”) Wait.
Wait.
Mikey: An M16.
Richard: I said wait!
Mikey: An M16 is a kind of machine gun. You can shoot the dog with that.
Richard: An M16. Yeah. That’s it. I want to get an M16 and shoot the dog.
Mikey: Good for you.
Richard: Good for me, not good for the dog. I want to kill him and cook him up
and eat him.
Mikey: Fine. You want to help cut some vegetables?
Richard: I don’t cut vegetables. You know that. The knife’s too sharp. Alex says
don’t touch the sharp knife. I’ll help eat it, though, if you want.
Richard grabs a bit of
carrot. He and Mikey tussle with and taunt each other (with lots of energy and
good humour).
Mikey: Get out of it you fat bastard!
Richard: I’m not fat. Look at you!
Mikey: Yes you are!
Richard: Yes, I am, but you can’t talk!
Mikey: Do you remember that girl from the supermarket the other day?
Richard: Which girl?
Mikey: The one I said was pretty.
Richard: The one I said I wanted to fuck?
Mikey: No. The one with the dark hair.
Richard: The one that looked like a boy?
Mikey: No. She had...
Richard: Na. I don’t remember.
Mikey: Anyway, I interviewed her for a job at work today.
Richard: I don’t know her.
Mikey: She was cool.
Richard: She good looking?
Mikey: Yeah. She is.
Richard: Does she have nice boobs?
Mikey: Yeah. She does, Dad. She’s gorgeous.
Richard: She better looking than Alex? Alex’s not bad you know, a bit fat… Did you
tell her you want her to suck your cock?
Richard laughs, and
Rose begins a slow exit through glad-wrap kitchen UR and offstage where she
removes her angel wings and quickly makes her way (offstage) to UL Rose’s room.
Mikey: No.
Richard: Still laughing Richard stands and imitates different sex acts. His pants
fall down around his ankles
But you do. You want
her to Ben Dover!
He sings the
playschool theme:
“Open wide, cum
inside, its play-school.” You want to-
Mikey: Shut up, Dad.
Richard: You want to make luuuurve to her…
Mikey: (Helping Richard pull his pants up) Shut-!
Richard: You’re pathetic; you know that, don’t you? I told you Alex is in love
with me. She told me she wants to suck me off.
A silence as Mikey
realizes that Rose has gone
Is dinner ready? What
time is it?
Mikey: It’s early.
Richard: It’s not that early. Is dinner ready?
Mikey: No.
SFX Mikey’s mobile
rings. Richard answers it.
Richard: Hello Richard Wolfe speaking… Hello?
Rose: LX up Rose’s room. She is on her mobile phone.
Hi
Richard. My name’s Rose. I was hoping to speak with Mike if I could.
Richard: Sure. I’ll get him for you.
Richard puts his hand
over the phone and whispers loudly:
It’s Rose Somebody! For
you! Is that okay?
Mikey: Yes, Dad. It’s fine.
(Mikey’s heart starts
racing)
He takes the phone.
Hello?
Rose: Hi, Mike. It’s Rose.
Mikey: Hey Rose. I was just thinking about you. I was wondering what you’re
doing for New Year’s – not that I’m asking you out – I was just – you know – (beat) it’s interesting to hear what people are doing
and that.
Rose: Yeah. Um- it is. Listen, Mike: I’ve decided not to take the position.
I’m sorry.
Mikey: Right-oh then (beat)
okay (beat) bye!
He hangs up.
Richard: Did that girl –
Mikey: Rose Dad. Her name’s Rose.
Mikey exits to
glad-wrap kitchen taking the carrot and chopping board with him (he leaves the
knife on the dining table)
Richard: Did she dump you?
Mikey: Yes Dad she did.
Richard: I told you it was a shit job.
Mikey:
(Returning to the
dining room) I’m gonna go for
a walk. You can look after yourself.
Richard: But I can’t.
Mikey: Yes you can.
Richard: But there’s no one.
Mikey: There’s you. Make
yourself a sandwich or something. Just do something simple.
Richard: Why can’t I come with you?
Mikey: Because.
Richard: Why?
A beat.
We could get pizza.
Mikey: I want to be alone.
Richard: You could buy me a coke.
Mikey: Why would I want to do that?
Richard: Because it’s the real thing. It would be great! Go on. I promise. Go
onnnnnn!
Mikey: Fine! Come then! Let’s Go.
LX down on dining room
and up on ‘street’ (including street lamp), as Richard and Mikey walk
downstage.
Richard: I don’t have money for pizza.
Mikey: I’ve got enough. Let’s go.
Richard: Are you sure?
Mikey: Yes!
Richard: Are you sure sure?
Mikey: Yes! Go.
Richard: Can we take Bo-Bo? (pause)
Mikey: No.
Richard: Not too fast. You’re going to fast.
Mikey: They stop and lean up against Glad wrap Alley. Richard mimics Mikey’s
gestures. Look at one another.
What?
Richard looks away.
What?! She didn’t
even see me. I’m a good
person. Look! Look at me. What? What else am I supposed to do? I just want
someone to tell me I’m okay. Just one. And then – then whatever – I just want
that to happen to me once in my life. Why’s that so hard?
A beat.
Eh?
Richard nudges him
with his elbow.
What?
A beat.
Richard: I need to go to the toilet.
Mikey: Really?
Richard: Yes.
Mikey: How soon?
Richard: Now. I could just piss here
Mikey: No you can’t.
Richard: I could.
Mikey: You could but you won’t. There’s one just there. (indicates DL)
Richard: Where!?
Mikey: Over There! Jesus, Dad. Go.
Mikey and Richard move
to DL. Richard stops in the street LX.
Richard: Guess what?
Mikey: What?
Richard: Come on, have a guess.
A beat.
Just guess!
Mikey: I don’t know.
Richard: Guess!
Mikey: What is it?
Richard: I’d like to put my cock in her.
He laughs. Mikey is
silent.
What?
She couldn’t hear me. (to a woman in the audience)You can’t hear me can you? (Puts his hand down his pants)
Mikey: Dad! Put it away!
Richard: Ow! Jeez Louise, you never laugh.
Mikey: What the fuck! do
you think you’re doing?
Richard: I’m NOT TOUCHING HER!
Mikey: You can’t do that in public.
Richard: Why not?
Mikey: Because you can’t.
Richard: What I do is not your problem.
Mikey: It is my problem.
It’s always my problem. And
if you’re going to behave like that then we can’t go out in public, ever!
Richard: Well fuck off then! Tonight thanks. What I do is my problem, because I
had an accident and you’re always picking on me so that’s it: pack your stuff
and get out. Right now, Go. Actually.
Richard, over-excited,
storms off DR, leaving Mikey alone. Mikey watches him leave and is almost
relieved he’s gone. Heartbeat SFX. Blackout. In blackout Richard moves UR near
dining room steps
Act 2
Scene 1
Heartbeat SFX
continues. LX up a touch on street light and glad wrap alley. LX full in Rose’s
Room. Rose is alone. She doesn’t see or hear Mikey. She
looks at her phone and maybe a photo?
Mikey: Moving around the space, in the
shadows…and possibly right up to Rose’s glad wrap wall. You should have heard my heartbeat the night you called me. I
thought – I don’t know – I thought a lot of things. I should have known, but
now, even now I can’t seem to get it through my head. My brain doesn’t work. I
keep seeing you in the supermarket or on the street: seeing your shape on
people who look nothing like you. Every time a customer comes into the shop I
think it’s going to be you, and I’m gutted when it’s not.
Heartbeat SFX fades
When I walk home I look for you, and when
I don’t see you I wonder how much I missed you by. During the day I talk to you
as if you care whether or not I shave, and at night I imagine us fucking. I
dream about wolves and angels. Look at you! Does it matter that I love you? I
think.
I feel like I’m never going to get past
you. I’m stuck. And what if you felt – something – and I said nothing? What if
you were my one real chance at happiness and I fucked it up?
Mikey steps into the street light, looking
in Rose’s window as she makes a call to Sean.
V/O: Hi you’ve called Sean. I’m not
available to take your call. Leave a message and I’ll get back to you.
Rose hangs up the phone. Mikey hesitates,
then walks away (to UR steps- grabbing a beer from the wings). LX down on
street light, LX lingers on Rose as Richard moves to dining chair. LX fades up
on dining room then blackout on Rose.
Scene 2
Bo-Bo’s tennis ball is on the table.
Richard sits, waiting. Mikey enters with a beer.
Richard: The dog’s dead.
Mikey: So I saw. He’s been hit pretty hard,
he’s a bit of a mess.
You want one? No? That’s right, you can’t
drink can you? That’s fun.
Richard doesn’t respond.
Well then. I guess we’d better bury our dead.
Richard: We should?
Mikey: Come on, Dad. Isn’t it the Wolfe Family
Way: whatever it is, take it and bury it in the ground? Don’t talk about it;
don’t deal with it; just bury it and pretend like it never existed. “Onward
Christian soldiers…!” Isn’t that it?
Richard: I didn’t know. I wasn’t sure.
Mikey: You’re right there, too. Have to be
sure. And what can you be sure of, really? One thing: your own feelings. I want
this. I don’t want that. That’s it. And who wants to bury a dog? Who wants to
fucking do anything they don’t want to? Common sense; simple common sense;
that’s all it is, really, isn’t it?
Richard: Can you do it?
Mikey: You’re helping.
Richard: I can’t.
Mikey: I’ll dig the hole but you’re helping.
We have to bury the whole doormat, so you’re helping me carry it.
Richard: I was afraid. I was alone.
Mikey: Yep. Being alone sucks, doesn’t it? How
are you feeling now? Better? Good.Did you eat? What did you eat?
Richard: Donuts.
Mikey: Donuts. How many did you have? (Richard
indicates 5) Five donuts! You won’t sleep. Tonight
is New Year’s, you know that don’t you?
Richard nods.
Good. I’m going out later.
Richard: But where are you going…
Mikey: To the (beat)
beach… near … (beat)
You’ll be all right. You might not sleep, but you’ll be fine.
Richard: Can I-
Mikey: You’ll be fine, Dad. Trust me. And
anyway, that’s what’s happening. Let’s do this dog then.
Richard: Okay.
Mikey: Hey. I’m sorry –for hassling you– I’m
just a bit out of sorts.
Richard: I hate funerals.
Mikey is surprised and puts a hand on
Richard’s shoulder.
What? I do. Funerals suck. I remember all
these people at Mum and Dad’s funeral. I didn’t know any of them.
Mikey: Can you remember how old were you?
Richard: They kept saying I had to be brave.
Mikey: Do you remember…
Richard: It sucked.
Mikey: I like the fact you keep your responses
so simple.
Richard: It sucked. That’s all I’m saying. I
don’t like funerals. Okay?
Mikey: Yeah it’s fine! It’s fine. You liked
BoBo a lot, didn’t you?
Richard shrugs.
You know you never once said it?
Richard: What? I didn’t. I mean, he was all
right, but I didn’t love him.
Mikey: Yeah, he was a pain in the arse, wasn’t
he?
Richard: He wasn’t a pain in the arse. He was
all right. He was good. I liked having him around. But I didn’t love him. He
sucked.
Mikey: Okay sure. Well: we better bury him
then.
Richard: I hate funerals.
Mikey: Fair enough. I hate digging holes.
Richard: What? Sometimes you’re such a shit!
BoBo got smashed up by a car… in four places…actually… and you’re complaining
about digging the hole!
Mikey: No, Dad. I’m not. I’m just saying I
don’t like digging holes. I don’t mind it; it’s
just not what I would choose to do with my New Year’s Eve.
Richard: Unbelievable!
Mikey: I’m joking, Dad. I’m joking. Actually I
love burying things. I bury my fear, my joy, my pain, my happiness, my
potential… And most of it I bury right here in your big fat belly!
Richard: As they exit UR
You’re fat (etc)
Mikey: You’re fat (etc). No crying, all right?
Richard: As if I would cry about BoBo.
Mikey: Right then.
They exit DR. LX crossfade from dining room
to beach.
Scene 3
SFX the sounds of waves and the sounds
of a variety of groups laughing and mingling somewhere else along the beach.
Mikey grabs a cough medicine bottle and re-enter UR. Mikey is drunk and drugged
to the point of hallucinating. He is acutely aware that he is alone but
surrounded by people. He composes himself to look optimistic. He holds up the
bottle as if talking to someone.
Mikey: Yeah, it’s cough medicine. I like it. I
like the woozy, stupid-feel – the dampening. That’s what I look for in a drink,
you know? No? Yeah, have a good night. You too. Seeya.
He salutes and takes another swig. He
strums an imaginary guitar to music he can’t hear; he looks out to sea as if he
is looking at something particular; he looks up and down the beach as if he is
waiting for someone;he, falls into a depression, then drinks more, then cycles
through the wave of thin and desperate optimism again, back to looking busy,
back to drinking… spiraling down. He sits on the dining room podium edge.
SFX wolf (Delerium track built into the
soundscape). LX Forest.
Richard appears from UR wearing a wolf mask. The sound of
wolves sniffing and scratching is very loud and threatening.
Mikey: What do you want? Get away. Get away
you!
Richard-the-wolf circles round toward
Mikey.
I said get away! Go! Oh. (beat) Get off! Get away!
Mikey moves away from the wolf to porthole
podium. SFX whispers. “It’s okay I love you It’s okay everything’s going to be okay I love you I love
you It’s okay Everything’s going to be okay” and “Mike Wolfe; Michael Wolfe;
Mikey,” over and over like layered music.
Rose, wearing angel’s wings, appears from UL and makes her way toward
Mikey. He reaches out to her…
I want you. I want you to- I want you to fuck me.
Rose lowers herself onto him. Mikey sighs
with happiness. Richard-the-wolf jumps upon the porthole podium! Rose-the-Angel
grinds on Mikey as Richard-the-wolf snaps at her. She screams and starts back.
Richard-the-wolf grabs her from Mikey and pushes Rose toward DR. Mikey moves
slowly upstage. As the Wolf makes to DL, LX to blackout.
Wolf sounds fade out as beach SFX continue
Beach LX on Mikey sitting on the edge of
the dining room podium- in front of the moon. Both Richard-the-wolf and
Rose-the-Angel have gone. Mikey is alone. He comes out of the dream slowly,
exhaustedly. He drinks, looks out to sea.
SFX mp3 player Delirium track.
Rose enters DR. Normal Rose, not
Rose-the-angel. She wanders on stage listening to music, holding a stubbie and
and looking out to sea. She is
listening to Silence, by Delerium, she stops and sits on the porthole podium. Mikey
looms up in front of her, very close to her. Rose starts, and Mikey closes the
gap.
Mikey: Rose!
Rose takes her headphones off. SFX Delerium
stops abruptly.
Rose: Sorry?
Mikey: Rose! It is Rose, isn’t it? The
peppermint tea girl (beat). It’s been a while.
How are you?
Rose: Good, you?
Mikey: You don’t remember me/
Rose: Yeah, no, I do, I do/
Mikey: I
interviewed you for the job at Captain Cups/
Rose: You’re the cups guy/
Mikey: Bitterly.
Yeah. I’m the cups guy/
Rose: That’s right. How are you/
Mikey: Mike/
Rose: Mike…of course/
Mikey: Mike Wolfe. (beat) So you do remember me?
Rose: Yeah. Of course I do.
Mikey: What can you remember?
A beat.
Can you remember anything?
Rose: Sure. You were – what was it – you were
teaching yourself the … the guitar.
Mikey: Yes! Well done. That’s very impressive.
Rose: Good. Yeah. So how are you going with
it?
Mikey: The guitar?
Rose: Yeah.
Mikey: Oh yeah you know. With Christmas and
everything I haven’t had much time to practice, but it’s coming along.
Rose: Oh that’s good. Cool.
Mikey: How’s your singing going?
Rose: Oh yeah. Good and bad. Mostly bad
actually, but that’s okay. I’m sure things’ll work out. How did the sale going?
Mikey: You know what I hate about working in
retail? Today this woman came into the shop. She’s almost as beautiful as you
even – and the whole time she’s talking on her mobile. She chooses this little
tea-light set – you know, with the glass backing plate and while I’m putting the sale through she’s on the phone and hasn’t looked at
me once, and as you know: it’s not a big store, but she’s laughing about
something and playing with things on the counter. But then she’s short, so I
say, “Excuse me, you need another fifty cents” and she says, “Hang on, Honey,
the shop boy needs to say something to me” and she just rolls her eyes at me,
picks up her money and walks out. You know how they used to say about butlers
and servants: that the best ones were almost invisible? – That’s what retail
is. People want to be able to just ignore one another. Our whole culture is
built around people’s desire to not be bothered while shopping. Sometimes, you
know, I wake up angry, with my jaw all clenched, and I just want to shout at
them. Just fucking – rah!
Rose: Maybe you should.
Mikey: What?
Rose: Shout at them.
A beat.
Not in the store, obviously. I mean
somewhere else, but out loud. I do it with singing sometimes. I think the body
gets damaged if it holds too many words inside. You should try it.
A pause.
Well. Um-
Mikey: How was your Christmas?
Rose: Family.
Mikey: Yeah. Me too. You got a big family?
Rose: Yeah no. Not really: brother and sister
and mum and dad. You?
Mikey: No. Just me and my dad.
Rose: You get along?
Mikey: Sort of. Not really. I can’t really
tell. He’s disabled. He has a brain injury which means he doesn’t remember
things. Sometimes he forgets my name.
Rose: Wow. That’s pretty full on.
Mikey: Yeah. Makes it easy at Christmas,
though. I just wrap up whatever’s lying around the house and give it to him. Ta
da! Not really. I got him gold class tickets to the cinema. He loved it.
Rose: How long ago was he injured?
Mikey: When I was fifteen.
Rose: What happened?
Mikey: He fell out of a tree. Yeah, it was
full on for a while. He’s funny now. He’s like a machine. He just wants and
wants and wants, and there’s no end to it. And it’s not that there’s anything
wrong with wanting. It’s just the constancy. It just – I don’t know – it rolls
me; it flattens me. He’s like a teenage boy with the brain capacity of a seven
year-old and the body of a fifty-eight year old walrus. Honestly, I think he’s
the most selfish person I’ve ever met.
Rose shifts her weight and looks at her
iPod.
Mikey: Do you want to hear a joke?
Rose: Okay. Sure.
Mikey: I made it up. It’s about an air
guitarist who plugs himself into his air amplifier and blows himself up.
Rose: Hey. That’s funny/
Mikey: Yeah. You know: blow up and blow, up/
Rose: Yeah. I get it/
Mikey: Yeah you get it/
Rose: It’s good
that I get it… It’s not a bad thing/
Mikey: Great. … Hey. It’s New Year ’s Eve.
What are you doing out here alone?
Rose: Oh. You know. Things don’t always come
together.
A beat.
Yeah. I think I’m going to keep walking.
That’s what I came out here for. It was good to see you. You have a good night
Mike.
Mikey: Happy New Year (attempts to kiss
her) Come on Rose.
Don’t be pathetic. It’s just a kiss.
Rose: Yep. I’m sure it is.
Mikey: Yep. Sure is.
Rose: Come on, Mike. Don’t be like that. I’m
sure you’ve got somewhere to go.
Mikey: Right-oh.
Mikey grabs her and roughly forces a kiss
on her cheek.
Rose: Hey. Come on/
Mikey: What? Was that so bad? You know it’s
that thing, that ability of women to talk to a guy and then leave as if he’s
nothing.
Rose: I didn’t – We were just talking.
Mikey: Is there a big queue of boys waiting
for you, Rose? Are there enough that you can forget a few and not really worry
about it? Must be nice.
I’m a good person, Rose. You know that? I
don’t hurt anyone. I work and I care for my dad and – fuck! – I’m a good
person!
You want to hear me shout? How’s this: I
FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU, BUT YOU DIDN’T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME.
Rose: You’re not in love with me.
Mikey: Oh but I am. I am. And you don’t even
want me to kiss you on the cheek. Well fuck that.
Mikey approaches Rose and pins her to the
porthole/podium. As his approach to her escalates, the Wolf rises and holds
Rose down.
Rose: I don’t know what you think this is but
it isn’t love.
Mikey looks up at her and, seeing how Rose
is looking at him, is horrified and ashamed. He backs off. Rose attempts to
leave and is blocked by the Wolf- she returns to face Mikey… then runs backs to
her room. LX down on beach. LX snaps to an eerie backlit semi darkness as
Richard runs DL and Mikey runs to UR glad wrap kitchen. (Offstage, Richard
removes the mask and places it UL, then enters dining room from UL)
Scene 4
LX up Rose’s Room. Rose enters and
eventually sits with her arms
wrapped around her knees, crying silently, for a long time.
Scene 5
Richard sits in dining room eating
cereal from a dog bowl. Mikey enters from UR
Mikey: What are you doing up?
Someone told me something funny tonight, Dad.
She told me I’m supposed to shout. Funny, hey? She told me words have to come
out or else they do more harm than good. What do you reckon? Well I agree with
her.
Richard shrugs.
You know, for a long time – for forever – I
believed I caused your accident. You had the idea that the top of that giant
pin oak would make a good Christmas tree but I was the one that liked Christmas
trees and I was the one that wanted it, but I was too scared to climb it
myself, so you did, and then you fell. That’s how I put it together. I told
myself it was my fault. Mum leaving, all of it. The accident, the time in
hospital, everything that happened after that. But you were drunk. And
arrogant. And stupid. You did it. It wasn’t my fault. It was you not me.
Richard: As if it’s obvious.
Yeah.
Mikey: (Laughs ruefully. A long held idea
has just been dismissed as foolish.) Do you know
what happened to me, Dad? It happened – oh – probably two weeks ago now: I read
an article. It was only small, you know: a couple of lines about a little girl
who was sexually assaulted at the zoo. They didn’t describe her other than to
say she was six or seven, but I have this image of a dress with a pink ribbon
tied in a bow and shiny clippety-clop shoes. She was at the seal enclosure and
a man came up and tried to kiss her. In the article they describe him as
mid-thirties, with long dark hair and wearing a coat. You know, just some guy
out at the zoo. The little girl ran away before he managed to do anything more
and ran back to her parents, who contacted zoo security. I wonder if the guy
was alone as well or if he ran back to a group, to his girlfriend even – maybe
she can’t have a baby, maybe he wants one, didn’t mean anything – he got over-exited
and wasn’t thinking. Or maybe he’s a predator and he went there with a purpose;
I don’t think so; it doesn’t feel right to me, but what do I know? I have the
habit of making excuses for people, of trying to think of a way for everything
to make sense, everything’s okay, no one should worry too much or get angry. I
wonder where that comes from, eh?… Eh?… That little girl’s parents would have
held her and said, “Its okay. It’s okay. He’s not going to hurt you. You’re
okay.” And they would be wiping away her tears and inside screaming and
tormented and torn with anguish about not being there with her and what could
have happened. All of them would be panicking and angry and needy. I could see
them rushing back to enclosure – where is that prick, that cunt?
They want to kill him, and if they find
him they will. But they can’t. I can feel them caught between wanting to act
and wanting to stay with the little girl– and in the back of their minds
they’re wondering how everything from that moment on has been changed by it.
Security people searched the grounds but didn’t find him and he’s now wanted by
police for being a child molester. A CHILD MOLESTER! What d’you reckon? Are you
listening? When I talk like this you might as well be deaf as well as brain damaged,
hey? Too many words, too much information.
Richard: (Still trying to avoid contact,
answers briefly without looking up at Mikey.) Disgusting. It’s disgusting.
LX out on Rose’s Room.
Mikey: Really? You know what I thought when I
read it? I thought, “What? That’s not assault.” Two weeks ago I pick it up and
my first thought is that’s not that bad. It’s not assault. It’s not ideal but
it’s not assault , you know what I mean? It’s not bad enough to make a fuss
about.” Do you know why I thought that? Do you remember?
Pause. He’s taunting Richard, knowing he
can’t answer.
What nice parents to over-react like that,
but if you make too much of a fuss about that you end up, I don’t know,
pathetic, a loser I guess, or a soft-cock – what the fuck? – I walked myself
into the question of what that little girl had lost: her confidence, the idea
that she was special, that people are not allowed to do that to her: take her
for granted, invade her space, her body. I’d always thought that pedophiles
were bad, with greasy hair and yellow teeth and putrid breath. But they’re not…
are they?
Richard: I don’t know.
A beat. A few breaths. LX change. Mikey
slowly enters his ‘memory’
Mikey: Do you remember I had tennis lessons
when I was nine?
(Richard makes the sound of a tennis ball
being hit) I had that old wooden racket. Bjorn Borg
was god but everyone else was cool: John McEnroe, Vitas Geralitis, Giurmo
Vilas.
Richard: Illi
Nastassi
Mikey: We all played tennis. We belonged to
the church and the tennis club and so did everyone else. I can’t even remember
his name. I wonder if that’s typical or not. You won’t remember. Maybe it was
Peter.
Richard: McEnroe – the shit brother
Mikey: Peter Someone. I don’t know. I used to
wear those little white nylon shorts. I went there and Peter Fucking
Whatshisname would stand behind me and I would be surrounded by him –
His moustache would rub on the top of my
head while his hands would slip down inside my shorts and fiddle with me.
Quick. He was just tucking my t-shirt in. That’s what he would say. That’s what
it looked like. I could feel his excuses like his breath, his body all around
me, warm and disgusting; it was
quick; it was just him copping a feel. I had no idea until about two weeks ago
that something that fast could be bad. I
remember being confused, and feeling awful, and sick, and not knowing what to
do, and then being told to hit some forehands. Hey look at you, your forehands
are great that’s great, isn’t that great?
(Post accident Richard transforms into ‘Big Rick’)
Richard (BIG RICK): Hit the forehand
Mikey!
Mikey: I think it’s funny that I still love
tennis. Funny- although stupid. But you just get over that shit don’t you?
Everyone has stuff happen to them.
Richard (BIG RICK): You suck at tennis.
Mikey: I don’t remember that. I just remember
that feeling of turning to shit in his embrace – and that’s the wrong word for it, but what else is there? I hadn’t really
noticed – didn’t know – until I read that piece and thought: yeah – maybe that
mattered, maybe you lose something when that shit happens – maybe I lost something, and I haven’t been able to find it. Ever since then
I’ve been looking and I didn’t know what for or why. I get angry. I blame other
people. I fuck things up. I lose people. I hurt everyone. But what can you say now? It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t do
anything wrong. But YOU KNEW! Everyone knew, but no one did anything. It was the running joke
around the club that Peter – what’s his fucking name? – that he wasn’t quite right, that he was either gay or a child
molester. But you never took it seriously…
I remember seeing you – you had a
cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other, (Big Rick pretends to smoke
a cigarette, using the knife) lording it up,
smiling at all the tennis-mums…
Richard (BIG RICK): Oh he’s all right.
Mikey: Like he was harmless. Like he wasn’t
hurting anyone. Everyone agreed with you. Big Rick said he was all right, so no
one had to worry about it. I’m nine, and I hear you say he’s a child molester
but in your opinion he was all right. I’m nine!
You were my Dad, so I listened. I “took it on board.” He got to molest me and I
didn’t do anything and everything that happened after happened because you said
it was okay. That’s what I lost, you know: the idea that it was never okay to do that to me. (Big Rick begins the transformation back
to post accident Richard) And I think oh yeah it
was just the seventies – people just weren’t aware or thought people could just
get over it – and maybe I am okay but if you look at my life I think it’s
obvious that something’s not quite turned out the way I would have liked. And
you – you fell out of tree so now I have to forgive you. And I hate the fact that there’s no one to be angry at. You know, that was
your chance to be the big man you always said you were, and you didn’t take it.
You didn’t protect me. You were supposed to protect me! But you didn’t. (Mikey
takes the knife from Richard) I can’t hate you and
care for you at the same time. I can’t do it anymore. I need help. I need you
to help me, and you can’t, can you? You can’t.
After a long silence (with Richard still
sitting at the table and Mikey some distance away, crying and cradling the
knife) Richard finds something funny.
Richard: You need help. You’re like me.
Mikey looks up, appalled.
You can’t remember his name. You’re a retard
too.
A beat.
Jeez Louise! You never ever laugh. You are
so serious. You don’t smile. You don’t laugh. Ever! And you whinge all the
time. Try falling out of a tree and smashing your head into four pieces. Try
being in hospital for three years…
Mikey: You were drunk when you climbed the
tree! No one made you do it.
Richard: I fell twenty feet.
Mikey: You were showing off.
Richard: And you’re just sad all the time.
Mikey: You were a drunk and a bully.
Richard: At least I laugh!
Mikey: You laugh at people. You!
Richard: You’re such a soft-cock.
Starting to laugh.
Mikey: Stop it!
Richard: You are such a loser-
Mikey, enraged, gets up and moves quickly
and aggressively towards Richard. Richard is terrified, and his terror causes
Mikey to realize he has the knife in his hand.
Mikey: Go to bed, Dad.
Richard doesn’t move.
Go somewhere!
Richard doesn’t move.
Leave me alone!
Richard still won’t leave. Mikey raises the
knife and stabs the table.
Richard: A beat. Richard starts to move to
exit UL.(offstage puts on wolf mask)
I’m
sorry, Mikey. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
Mikey picks the knife out of the table and
moves to the porthole podium. He sits and plays with the knife. He runs the
knife against the skin on his wrist with the idea of killing himself.
SFX of a tennis ball being hit.
The Wolf enters from UL, bouncing a tennis
ball. Quietly, he approaches Mikey at the porthole podium. Mikey pathetically,
starts playing tennis shots (with the knife as the racket). The Wolf moves up
onto the porthole podium in and around behind Mikey- who is small standing in
front of the podium)
Mikey: In a thin, choked squeak.
I can’t speak. Oh god. Please don’t make
me.
Slowly, he starts to get angry, to speak
louder and move more assertively.
I don’t want to hurt. I don’t want to be
sorry all the time.
The Wolf embraces Mikey and gropes for his
genitals.
Don’t do that. I don’t want to feel like
that.
Mikey shrugs off The Wolf. It’s not hard;
The Wolf moves upstage to the dining room. The tennis ball SFX fades out.
Mikey steps up on the podium leaning toward
the imagined coach, threatening with the knife, ready to kill. Muttering at him
to stop doing that etc etc. Richard removes the wolf mask.
Richard: What are you doing, Mikey?
Mikey: What?
Richard: What are you doing?
Mikey: (Angry.) What do
you want me to do?
Richard can’t answer.
Nothing. I’m so fucking sad and lonely and
desperate it’s disgusting. What was I going to do to her? Rape her? I would
have. I wanted to.
A beat.
What? Say something. Say, “Jeez, I would
have fucked her.” Go on. I don’t understand you.
Richard laughs.
That’s right! You laugh and you kill me
for not laughing. You say, “Jeez Louise, you never laugh!”
Richard: Still laughing.
It’s true. The thing with you is that you
never, ever laugh.
Mikey: So what? So I’m supposed to laugh now?
Richard shrugs.
Fuck it. I’m leaving. First thing in the
morning I’m moving out.
Richard: Really?
Mikey: You’ll be fine, you know that? I guess
you already knew. The problem was that I didn’t. We’ll get someone to come and
care for you.
Richard: Can we get someone better than you?
Mikey: Sure. Shit you’re a fuckin’ hard case,
you know that?
Richard: Don’t swear. I’m not a hard case. I’m
a good person, a better person than you. A beat. Mikey lets it go
Mikey: It’s late.
Richard: Yeah.
Mikey: Time to go to bed.
Richard: (Moving toward bedroom exit UL) Yeah.
Mikey: Happy New Year.
Richard: Happy New Year.
LX fade down on Richard. LX linger on Mikey
standing on the porthole podium Angel wing feathers fall gently on Mikey as LX
fades .
Blackout.
The End
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